In your personal life, when attending to business or working on side
projects, how often do you spend 8 consecutive hours in front of a
computer? It doesn’t make sense because we lose the ability to
concentrate effectively within a few hours.Everyone goes through
alternating periods of high and low mental acuity. There are days
when I work on personal projects for well over 8 hours, but the time
is always divided into multiple sessions. I might spend a few hours
coding a design, a few hours writing, and a few hours reading feeds,
moderating comments, and responding to email.

I work this way because it aligns with my mental energy cycle. Any
more than 3 hours in front of a computer and my eyes start hurting
and I become restless. I lose the ability to do my best work.
Instead of forcing myself to continue, I switch to an activity that
allows my mind to recharge. These breaks maximize productivity by
eliminating down periods. It’s counter productive to force work when
the mental energy isn’t there.

The Problem with an 8 Hour Work Day

A continuous 8 hour work day is a relic of the past. It makes sense
for physical labor and manufacturing work, but with information
workers it doesn’t account for the mental energy cycle. The ability
of a factory worker to think analytically is irrelevant, he’s either
cranking widgets or he isn’t.

In the case of the modern information worker, nearly all tasks
involve creative or strategic thinking. The way someone answers an
email or interprets a piece of information can differ drastically
depending on his or her energy level. Nobody does their best work
5:30 in the afternoon after they’ve been sucking down coffee all day
to stay awake.

I can’t speak for all workers, but I’ve observed that productivity
levels generally peak twice a day — first thing in the morning and
shortly after lunch. The most productive period is the beginning of
the day. People are capable of creative tasks like writing and
solving complex technical problems. After a couple hours of intense
work, energy levels drop and workers downgrade to less demanding
tasks like responding to email and tinkering with existing
creations. Towards the end of the cycle, the mind is so cluttered
and drained that workers resort to “work related activities” that
appear productive but don’t contribute to the bottom line. The
afternoon cycle is similar but the productivity peak isn’t as high.
For different people the peaks and valleys will vary, but overall
I’d estimate only 3-4 hours a day could
be classified as highly productive.

This number isn’t caused by slacking. You can’t force an information
worker to be highly productive when the energy isn’t there. Workers
can try their hardest, but the work just won’t have that creative
edge. The low ratio of highly productive hours to total hours worked
is the result of the continuous 8 hour work day.

When workers reach the low energy part of the cycle, they can’t
recharge with a non-work activity. The only option is office
purgatory. You can’t be highly productive because you’re mentally
fatigued, but you can’t recharge because the 8 hour work day
requires the appearance of constant productivity. The result is
millions of unproductive workers trapped at their desks when they’d
rather be doing something else.

Alternative Work Arrangements

The obvious solution to this problem is planning around the mental
energy cycle by breaking the work day into multiple segments. The
traditional office setting doesn’t accommodate this because there
are few available recharge activities. People can’t do household
chores, run errands, or engage in recreational activities without
leaving the workplace.

Some companies have tried to make the work environment more
accommodating by offering meals, fitness centers, and special areas
for relaxation. Although these amenities are certainly an
improvement, they’re expensive for employers and only partially
satisfy employees.

The solution that makes the most sense is a remote work arrangement
because it reduces employer costs and allows employees to adjust
their work schedule to their mental energy cycle. When a worker
becomes mentally fatigued, they can go off the clock and engage in
recharge activities that are personally productive like exercise or
relaxation. When energy returns, the worker can start working again
at a high level, effectively cutting out the low productivity period
of the cycle. Employers don’t pay for unproductive time and
employees get to work in a more natural pattern that adjusts to
their personal lives.

Why isn’t everyone doing this already? Many workers already are, and
as commutes get worse and communications improve, the number will
continue to increase. Of course there will always be a need for
officeworkers in businesses (like doctor’s offices and law firms)
that require daily customer interaction, but for most companies it
really isn’t necessary.

There is also the argument that people need to collaborate in
person. This is steadily becoming less essential. Most office
communications are already done through email or instant messager.
Face to face meetings are certainly necessary, but for the vast
majority of lower and mid level employees meetings are the exception
and could be conducted via phone/video conference or condensed into
one or two days a week.

Another common objection is that employees will abuse remote work
arrangements by slacking off. I’m inclined to believe that most
adults value their employment enough that this isn’t a problem. In
cases where supervision is required, web cams and other technology
can used to monitor a worker.

I suspect the real reason remote work arrangements are still the
exception is inertia. Companies are used to doing business in the
office and are reluctant to change. There is also the presence of
office politics. If one person is given a remote arrangement,
jealous employees will complain. Doesn’t it make sense to give
everyone what they want and save a boat load of cash on office
space?

I may only be a kid in his 20’s, but I can tell when something just
makes sense. I perceive an increasing number of people are noticing
the same phenomena. Forty years from now we’ll be telling our
grandchildren about the olden days when everyone’s mommy and daddy
went to work in an office.

In the simplest explanation, balance in life means ‘time for everything’. Work-life balance means you undertake and enjoy the responsibilities and workloads of both, your work and your family life. Balance doesn’t necessarily mean having more free time. But it does mean that you utilize every moment in a way that is as pleasant and productive for your own living.

Why a work-life balance is important?

Life is obviously more important than work. But without work, life wouldn’t be a complete one too. The first and foremost reason to have a job is to build a life that is most comfortable and hassle-free. The years that have been spent for so much of studies are for getting a job like this. But once you land up with your desired job, instead of a new exciting life, you loose the balance just like a newborn trying to fly a kite.

You have already come through the reasons. Now let’s see the problems when there is no work-life balance. The basic problems happen due to the absence of a proper balance in life are,

• Health and fitness problems
• Stress and tensions
• Relationship problems
• Financial Problems

But these basic problems will give rise to unimaginable consequences. Diseases, most rare and fatal, mental disorders, memory problems etc may just haunt you like anything. But where is the help? What are the ways to find a rhythm of life? What are the necessary elements in your life that need a proper alignment and balance? Just scroll down….

Tips for a work-family agreement

Knowing when to disconnect, shut it off, unplug, or walk away from work is one of the essential keys to balance work and family life.

When was the last time you completely left work behind? How frequently do you take work home, check e-mail or voice mail from home, or take your work with you on vacation? Do you feel you can’t afford to not do these things? What’s the real impact on your personal sense of balance when you are consistently making work your top priority?

However, more often than not, you let work seep into your personal lives even when there’s not a bonafide emergency or time-urgent crisis. You’ve become so accustomed to the ever-presence of your work that you’ve unconsciously allowed further intrusions that have, in many cases, become unreasonable.

1) Plan your life

Plan your works and the time for each of them. Avoid working late or taking assignments home out of habit. Do it only when you have an urgent project deadline. It will not be a wise career move to be a clock-watcher or an Out At 5 kind of guy, but it is a good idea to make plans after work a couple of days each week. It will get you out the door at a reasonable hour and refocus your attention.

2) Work at work and family with family

Protect each role from interference by the others. When you are at work do your work with dedication. At home be a total family man. Turn off your cell phone, laptop, beeper, or email when you are at home, so that you can be fully “present” during this time. Similarly, when you are at work, try to limit personal life intrusions – this will help you be more efficient and effective during your workday.

3) Achieve a psychological balance

Time is not necessarily the main conflict you experience between work and personal life. Most of the time it is your psyche that destroys your balance. The psychological disturbances have serious impact over the work-life ongoing. The psychological conflicts (guilt, difficulty “turning off” work behaviors at home, pressure, anxiety) create the most problems. To balance here, you have to withdraw your mind from some of those unhelpful emotional participations. This will help cut all the negative emotions you have.

4) Utilize office options

Take advantage of your workplace’s family-friendly policies and supports. If your workplace offers discretion over the methods, timing, or location of your work, use this flexibility to improve your situation. Check for the availability of workplace options such as flex-time, telecommuting, compressed work weeks, vacation purchase plans, etc. Many companies are recognizing the importance of satisfied employees and are helping them achieve worklife balance.

5) Share the Load

Don’t assume yourself doing all the family necessaries. Get your partner or other family members to help you with all your personal/family responsibilities. Taking care of the household, children, or parents should not be the responsibility of just one person.

6) Take it easy- the best policy

Except living, everything is of no value. This is a great philosophy to be understood. Don’t give something an importance more than what it deservers. Let things go smoothly and easily. Learn to recognize the things that don’t really have much impact in your life and allow yourself to let them go.

Tips to balance your WORK and LIFE

Life is more than a series of meetings- emails and presentations. But when you get a job in one of your dream companies, when you start working, when responsibilities haunt you from behind, you tend to miss life somewhere under a pile of tensions and deadlines.

Since no steps are taken to bring back that LIFE into your life, by the time small tensions grow up to big diseases and deadlines broaden to your lifetime.

Absence of a work-life balance is commonest in today’s professional lives. Responsibilities are the criminals here. When your work demands more responsibility from you, the other side of your life starts struggling. When life, importantly personal or family life, calls for more attention from your side, your professional focus sinks. This kind of an aimless, unbalanced life-flow offers you tensions and stress lavishly and you fall as an easy victim to the diseases every time. No wonder, very strange and rare diseases befall, as you struggle from all the spheres of your being, the physical, psychological as well as the spiritual being.

Life of a technology professional: What’s wrong?

Let’s get down to the world of technology professionals. If you are a professional, sure, you wouldn’t have time even to scroll down to the bottom of this mini-course. But don’t escape; stay on, as it is going to save a whole lifetime for you.

Technology is the forerunner of life today. In the last 80-100 years, the world of technology has seen a high-speed growth. Today, it’s the beginning, center and the horizon of life. In order to come up with competing and cutting edge technological outgrowths, countries and companies are on a lifetime marathon. But in the meanwhile, no one puts a break to find out the miseries of the players, the professionals who are behind all the success.

IT has always been a tension-generating field of work. The life of an IT professional is an all time push-pull between deadlines and tension generating exertions. There are specific reasons why IT delegates such enormous pressures on the laborers.

• The extreme competition between companies. To produce the most competent technology or software and to acquire a top seat in the long time run, the companies compete endlessly. This battle directly puts the employees under extra work pressures, as the companies always want more from them.
• Deadlines. Frequent deadlines for projects that are very complicated and time-consuming take the employee out of a balanced life.
• Unmatchable growth of technology. Cutting edge technological introductions puts pressure to the professional most of the time, as it may be difficult to comprehend and follow.
• Poor team works. Teamwork that is below satisfactory levels gives pressure to everyone included in the team. Least performing and uninterested team-mates chop the confidence of the hard workers and untie their self-assurance towards the work. Personal relationship inside the teams too counts to the stress level of the employee.
• Due to strict work schedules, when there is no enough time to concentrate on the way of healthy living, the professionals face enormous problems in life. Add to that when carelessness originates, the balance of life slips almost completely due to unavoidable diseases and health problems. Frequent food avoidance, sleeplessness, unproductive habits that are fatal to the health are some of the widely seen lifestyle elements among professionals.

While the job rewards you with commensurate financial packages, a good part of your life is gone under the tight schedules of working. Constant pressures get you with fatal diseases. Deadlines hang before your smooth flow of life and takeout the interest to a large extent. Projects have to be completed in time so that your personal requirements are sacrificed. Family, friends, funs and fantasies appear blurred before your office tensions and temperaments. And some of you may even take those bites of pressures handsomely to your homes, thus making the scene worse than ever.

At one side there are personal responsibilities and physical complaints. And at the other end there are official responsibilities and deadlines.

Family against career! Responsibilities against obligations!

What can you satisfy? What you would quit? You get totally confused. You need to balance. You want that extra hold that helps you balance between the pressures of work and commitments of home.

The importance of this article is at this point. It has got those mantras of work-life balance. It really means a lot when you are reasonably tired of tossing your work and life time to time. So give yourself to this article for the moment. By the time you relax your tensions, it will carry you to a world, where the secrets of balancing your life are hidden like an instant treasure. But before that you should know what is meant by balanced life?

Interpersonal conflicts occur from time to time in every organization. If left unresolved, they can result in lower productivity, employee turnover, morale problems and sometimes lawsuits. Early intervention and clear communication are two key factors in addressing interpersonal conflicts. It is also important to acknowledge emotional issues surrounding the conflict and to ensure that the way work duties are organized is not contributing to the problem.  

Any official city actions (e.g., discipline) must be based on the work-related behavior of the employees involved in the conflict, not on the thoughts, beliefs or feelings that they express. Generally, the best results are obtained when a solution is negotiated with all of the parties involved, rather than dictated from the top-down. Unfortunately, some conflicts cannot be resolved and in those cases, the goal may be to minimize the city’s liability and any other “fallout” from the conflict.

 Why get involved?

Interpersonal conflict is involved to one degree or another with almost every type of employment claim or grievance. Even if there is no formal complaint, it can result in lower productivity, employee turnover, and morale issues (gossip, backstabbing, e-mail wars, physical altercations, competing “camps” of employees). In some situations, interpersonal conflict has resulted in the loss of key employees. Interpersonal conflict is also sometimes associated with absenteeism, workers’ compensation claims, and group health insurance costs. Employees who are involved in an interpersonal conflict may take “mental health” days off, be more likely to get injured at work, become clinically depressed or develop stress-related medical issues.

Why are people unable to constructively resolve conflict between them?

There are many reasons why conflicts don’t get resolved immediately:

1. Incompatible interests (e.g. both parties want the same job assignment).

2. A fundamental difference in values or a fundamental disagreement about “how” to resolve the conflict (“I’m the boss; therefore, I win.”).

3. Different versions of the “truth” about the cause of the initial conflict (“You stole that job assignment from me” vs. “You dropped the ball on that assignment.”)

4. Both parties are too angry to speak constructively to each other.

5. One or both parties deny responsibility for the conflict and expect a higher authority to resolve it by telling the other party he or she was wrong.

6. Different views or desires about the nature of their relationship (e.g., “We’re basically ‘equals’.” vs. “I’m the boss.”)

Resolving Conflict/Solving the Problem

How to resolve the conflict depends to some extent on your role. If you are in a position of authority (City Administrator or elected official), it may be your responsibility to make sure conflicts are resolved so employees can get their work done. A co-worker who really isn’t involved in the conflict may have little or no role. Regardless of your role, there are some basic methods and ideas that are common to most conflicts:

1. Acknowledge the emotions of the parties involved and address their fears. If a conflict

occurs between the City Clerk and the Deputy Clerk over duties, there may be some

emotional baggage that needs to be addressed. The Clerk may fear the Council is thinking

about forcing him out and giving the job to the Deputy Clerk. In this case, the Council

may need to find a way to address the Clerk’s fear of losing his job before they can

resolve the conflict.

2. Communicate Clearly. Sometimes conflicts can be alleviated by clear communication.

Consider a situation where the City Council doesn’t feel that the Administrator is keeping

them informed and the Administrator feels the Council is micro-managing. Clear

communication about the expectations of both parties is crucial to resolving this type of

conflict. Holding annual performance evaluations and quarterly “check-in” sessions

provides scheduled opportunities for communication and may help resolve or avoid the

conflict.

3. Take Action Based on Behavior. In all conflicts, there is a great temptation to react to the

emotional component of the conflict. However, it is important that any official actions

taken by the city or its supervisors are based on behavior. An organization cannot control

what people think and feel; it can only control what they do. If one employee states that

he really dislikes a coworker, the city should probably not take action based on that

statement alone. On the other hand, if the employee refuses to talk to the co-worker even

when it is necessary to get job assignments completed, then the city can take action based

on the refusal to communicate on work-related matters.

4. Intervene Early. It is a very human tendency to want to minimize and ignore conflicts.

However, this sometimes allows a conflict to fester and grow until it becomes

unmanageable. As a guideline, it is better to address a small conflict directly and

immediately.

5. Organize the Workflow. While overlap of duties and cross-training is generally good for

the organization, it may not feel good or “comfortable” for the individual. Most of us feel

secure when we have job duties that are unique to our position; this makes us feel

“needed” by the organization. When others are given overlapping assignments or crosstrained in our jobs, we feel less secure and more expendable. Analyzing workflow and duties to determine ways to address “security needs” vs. the needs of the organization for back-up and cross-training may alleviate the source of some conflicts. Another related issue is unclear reporting structures. An employee who has to keep more than one boss happy is likely to run into conflicts when the bosses disagree with each other. This type of supervision is generally challenging and should probably be avoided unless absolutely necessary.

6. Negotiate Solutions. Basically there are three ways to resolve a conflict:

a. Compromise;

b. Win/Lose; or

c. Win/Win.

While it is sometimes necessary to use the first two methods, the third method is the only

one that meets the needs of both parties. There are several ways to employ the third

method (i.e., find a mutually acceptable solution):

• Expand the Pie. Find ways to create more of the resource that the parties are fighting over.

For example, if two employees are having a conflict because both want to use the same

funding to attend a conference, one way to resolve the conflict is to “expand the pie” by

finding additional funds so both can attend.

• Compensation. Find a way to compensate one of the parties for yielding on an issue. In the above conference-funding example, perhaps the employee who “yields” and lets the other employee attend the conference gets to attend their conference in the next fiscal year.

• Goodwill-Building. Each side concedes on issues of lesser importance to build goodwill, trust and agreement. In any conflict, there are usually a few issues of central importance and a few “kitchen sink” types of issues. If the two parties can find agreement on the smaller issues, it can build the foundation for agreement on the central issues. This can work well in negotiating a labor contract. For example, if health insurance contribution is a big source of disagreement, the two sides may be able to agree on smaller issues in order to build trust and goodwill. This may make it easier to tackle the health insurance contribution issue later.

• Bridging. Create new options that satisfy critical underlying interests/needs. Consider a

Councilmember who is at odds with the City Clerk. In this situation, the underlying issue

may be the Councilmember’s need for more information than the Clerk has been providing.

The conflict may be resolved by requiring the Clerk to provide weekly updates to the City Council on various aspects of the city’s management.

What if we’ve tried everything?

Some conflicts cannot be resolved or at least cannot be resolved given the amount of time, money or effort the city can afford to expend. In this case, the focus may switch from resolving the conflict to minimizing liability or other issues. If two employees cannot seem to work together despite the city’s best efforts, the city may decide to establish “ground rules” for the employees’ behavior towards each other and then closely supervise the interactions between the two employees to enforce those ground rules. Or, the city may rearrange work duties and assignments to minimize the interaction of the two employees. These “work-arounds” are not ideal and usually will not solve the problem in the long term, but at times may be the only realistic option available to the city. Sometimes, the only answer to an interpersonal conflict involves removing one party from the workplace. Determining how to do this and when it is appropriate probably should not be attempted without substantial legal advice and input.

source : www.lmcit.lmnc.org

Q. How do you manage the prototypical “difficult boss?”

A. Successfully managing a difficult boss is a challenge but often
feasible. First, you should try to understand the reasons for your
boss’ difficult behavior. Assuming your boss generally behaves in a
fairly reasonable manner, and that his/her difficult behavior seems
to
be a result of stress overload rather than his/her character, chances
are good that the behavior can be modified. If your boss’ behavior
seems to reflect a chronically hostile, abusive style of interacting
regardless of the amount of stress in the worksite, the chances are
less positive that the behavior can change. In fact, you may want to
consider seeking counsel from a trusted mentor or human resources
professional to evaluate your options. Second, you have to manage
your
own negative emotions regarding his/her behavior so that you do not
engage in self-defeating behavior (e.g. stonewalling, or counter-
attacking your boss).Third, once you understand and have managed your
own negative reactions, you may work to communicate your issues/
concerns — but framed in a helpful positive manner — creating an
atmosphere for problem resolution.

Q. If you feel you’ve been criticized unfairly by your boss, what’s
the best way to confront the boss with your concerns?

A. You should discuss your concerns — not confront your boss. There
is a difference. You need to carry out the discussion of your
concerns
in a non-adversarial way. Like a marriage, you should try to handle
your complaints in a manner that does not do further damage to your
relationship.

Q. What’s the best way to respond to criticism from your boss?

A. Try to see the criticism as valuable information about how to do
better, not as a personal attack. Try to separate your personal ego
from your business persona. Try hard to control your impulses to
react
emotionally or defensively. Try to see the criticism as an
opportunity
to work together with your boss on a development plan. See yourself
as
a partner with your boss on this plan, rather than on seeing yourself
as a victim of a power struggle.

Q. How can empowering employees help lessen stress agents in the
workplace?

A.When employees feel less like “victims of circumstances out of
their
control,” they feel more empowered. Employees who are given candid
timely and consistent communications from management about the status
of their careers, as well as more responsibility to directly manage
their careers and their work relationships, they tend to be less
anxious and more highly motivated. Although few employees believe
that
job security is a guarantee anymore, employees who are empowered with
ore information and responsibility over their future, tend as a
whole,
to cope more effectively — because they feel less powerless.

Q. Sometimes employees are hesitant to speak to their boss about
criticism. Is there a way to overcome that fear or retribution?

A. The chances that your fear of retribution will turn into reality
will be significantly reduced to the degree that you can discuss
criticism with your boss in a reasonable non-emotional, non-defensive
manner. You can avoid setting up your boss to be angry at you and
therefore risk retribution by careful planning and diplomatic
communication.

Q. What’s the best way to deal with stress in the workplace?

A. Stress is always in the eye of the beholder. What may cause one
employee stress in the workplace, may not even cause a ripple of
concern to another. The key to dealing with stress is knowing the
specific stresses on the work environment that you are particularly
sensitive to and the warning signs in your own body and mind that
signal stress overload. Once you have identified your vulnerability,
you can create on-going stress management strategies to cope with the
issues.

If you feel unable to manage this process yourself, or feel
overwhelmed, it may be a good idea to consult an objective
professional, such as a psychologist. Your collaboration with a
professional may go a long way in making you feel more empowered to
manage the stresses.

Marilyn Puder-York, Ph.D., answers your questions. Dr. Puder-York is
a clinical psychologist in New York who specializes in workplace
stress issues.Copyright � 1997 American Psychological Association

 Identify the type of the conflict – this first step is very important because each type of conflict (interpersonal conflicts, intergroup conflicts, interest conflicts, value conflicts, relationship conflicts, emotional conflicts) needs a certain strategy.

 Be aware of the aggressive responses and their consequences, also of the alternatives – aggressiveness generates just aggressiveness, only finding out alternative ways to react to the violence you can stop the boomerang effects of the violence.

 Face up the conflict rather than avoid it – you have to be aware of the negative consequences such as irritability, tension and the persistence of the problems, if you avoid the conflict.

  Respect yourself and your interests, but also the other and his interests – everyone must have a positive self-image and the proper respect so the insights on the conflict to be realistic. The approach based on respect always eliminates inappropriate tactics.

Accept and understand cultural differences – people around you are from various cultures which imply different ways of thinking, dressing, beliefs and values. So something that is obvious and right to some of us could be otherwise for other ones.

 Make the difference between interests and “taking stands” – the positions of some people could be opposite even if their interests are not. For example, two people want the same object but each one is interested on some part or advantage of it.

 Explore personal and other’s interests to identify common ideas and compatibilities – when you analyze not only your but also other’s attitudes, it increases the empathy between you and the probability to find out a solution to the problem.

 Consider conflict interests as a mutual problem that can be solved by cooperation – if you can’t identify a way to the mutual gain, at least set up some rules for the mutual understanding.

 Communicate and listen to the other – try to put yourself in his position, efficient communication is an important element for finding a constructive solution. Active listening has to be the primary and only behavior in a conflict because it helps to find out other’s opinion.

 Be careful to elements like subjectivity, subjective perception of reality, thinking stereotypes present in a conflict – generally, subjective perceptions and judgments make hard to reach the empathy. Further on, there is an obvious tendency to assign aggressive intentions to the other.

Psychologist, Nicoleta Cramaruc

At the first sight the collocation “tough conditions” make us think to bad, pain and suffering. Usually we think the tough situations and events as something bad for us. But let’s take a close look and decide if they are bad.

Let’s take the situation when we want to achieve a goal but encounter a lot of obstacles on the way to the finish. Are obstacles bad things? Yes they are if they prevent you from achieving your goal. But once you solved them they become a good experiment for you. They enriched your experience and the next time you encounter them you’ll know how to tackle them. Also your will and character won something good.

There are two dimensions of our life which are influenced differently by though conditions: personal comfort and personal development. For our personal comfort the though situations are bad, because they pull you out of your comfort zone. For our personal development the though events and conditions are good ones. They are favorable conditions because they help us grow. The growth process isn’t possible without challenges and obstacles.

To live a meaningful and interesting life doesn’t mean not to encounter obstacles but to pass them successfully.

Imagine a scale of mind states with two extremes. At one extremity there is a state of mind full of certainties, at the other one a state full of doubts. And between these two extremities there are another three states of mind: the first one in which predominant are certainties but doubts are present too, the second one in which predominant are doubts but certainties are present too and finally the third in which certainties and doubts are in a relative equilibrium.

The two extremities exist only in theory, in real world is very hard if not impossible to find an individual whose mind is full only of certainties and no doubt at all or vice versa. Even an individual with a mind at an absolute equilibrium, between certainties and doubts, is hard to find. The majority of us fall in one of the other two categories: the first one in which predominant are certainties and the second one in which predominant are doubts.

The question is which one is the most beneficial to our lives? Which one is the path to follow? Before we can give an answer to these questions let’s see what each category is all about.

1. When your mind is in a state in which predominant are certainties you believe that you know for sure where you come from, who you are, what you know and feel, what you have to do and what you can do.
Pros: This state of mind is favorable to ACTION; if you love action then this is the path to follow. You have to believe you know for sure what you want and what you can do if you want to be an achiever. This state not only helps you achieve what you want but, at the same time, it makes you feel confident and happy.
Cons: In this state of mind is very probable that you aren’t receptive to others and their ideas; you think you are the only holder of the truth, even if the most of your certainties may be false. This state increases the probability to acquire and keep false certainties, and to act in the name of false beliefs, values, attitudes, practices and ideas.

2. When your mind is in a state in which predominant are doubts you believe that you don’t know for sure many essential things for your life.
Pros: This state of mind is the path that leads to TRUTH. You have to believe that you don’t hold the absolute knowledge in order to access truth. This state helps you get closer and closer to truth, making you a thinker, and most important to get rid of useless and time, energy consuming beliefs, values, attitudes, practices and ideas. Now, you are receptive to others and their ideas and so you can enrich your knowledge.
Cons: This state undermines determinant actions, because in this state you may doubt what you have to do and what you can do. In this state of mind you don’t feel too confident because you may doubt your knowledge and your power to act.

Now is up to you what path to choose consciously, because unconsciously you already are in one of them!

No freelancer is perfect – not me, not you, not even the best of us. We all make mistakes, all the time, and if we’re smart, we learn from them.

Some mistakes, however, are more crucial than others, and if we can correct or avoid those mistakes, we’ll survive. We’ll still make other mistakes, but they won’t hurt as much.

Let’s take a look at some of the most essential mistakes that freelancers, new and old, often make, and how to avoid them.

Missing deadlines. I wrote more on this topic in this post, but basically, your ability to put out quality work and meet deadlines is what makes your reputation. And as a freelancer, your reputation is all you have. If you miss deadlines too often, you will soon see your clients going elsewhere. How to avoid: Make deadlines one of your top two priorities (along with putting out great work), overestimate how long it will take you, break the project into smaller steps, and be accountable every step of the way.

Charging too little. New freelancers, especially, undervalue themselves and charge less than they’re worth. That’s OK if you’re just breaking into the business, and don’t have any previous work or reputation to point to. But once you’ve got some stellar work under your belt, don’t be afraid to ask what you’re worth, otherwise you are selling yourself short. And you’ll be working too much just to pay the bills. (See this article for more.) How to avoid: It’s good to find out what the market avergage is, and charge a little more. This tells clients that you’re good. A good way to do the math is to figure out how much you want to make, and how many hours you realistically plan to work. Then charge based on those numbers.

Lack of preliminary research. This is research before making your pitch, not before completing the assignment. Often a freelancer will contact a potential client and make a pitch, without really understanding the client or his needs, and without knowing how this project will add value to the client. This approach will get you very little business. How to avoid: Research the client thoroughly before making contact. The Internet is a great way to do that, of course. Know what the client does, the client’s market, what the client’s goals are (in general), and figure out how you can help the client meet those goals. How will you add value? Direct your pitch at those issues.

Choosing the wrong clients. The client-freelancer relationship is an important one, and there are many issues that can make a client the wrong client, or the right client, for you. Those include the market they’re in, they’re working style, how difficult they are, how likely they are to pay your rate, how much work they require, their ability to pay on time without hassle, and more. If you choose the wrong client, you will make less money, be unhappy, and work more. How to avoid: Select clients carefully. Again, research them, talk to other freelancers who’ve worked for them. When contacting a client, think of it as a two-way interview – they are trying to decide if you’re right for them, but you should also be trying to decide if they are right for you. Do your first assignment or three on a trial basis, to see how things work out. Every now and then, evaluate your clients to see if they’re worth the trouble.

Getting too personal. It’s good to be friendly with a client, but keep it professional. You don’t want to be best friends. You shouldn’t be too formal, either, but if you become personal, two things could happen: 1) one of you could get hurt or angry at the other based on a business decision; or 2) the client might think you’re unprofessional. Either one is bad for business. How to avoid: Start any correspondence on a formal basis, and then get friendlier depending on how the client handles communication. Don’t be afraid to be friendly, but at the same time, don’t go beyond business, and don’t cross the line into unprofessionalism.

Letting off steam. If there is a problem with a client, some freelancers have a tendency to vent their frustration – at the client. For example, if an editor decides not to run my article, I might show my frustration and displeasure in a very angry way. This is bad. It will harm your professional reputation, both with this client and with future clients. And it will lead to decreased business over time, if you continue this mistake. How to avoid: If there is a problem with a client, and you are angry or frustrated, do not communicate right away. Let your steam off some other way, through talking to a friend, through exercise, through eating a carton of ice cream. But don’t do it at your client, or anyone else in your professional world. Bite your tongue. Then, when you’ve calmed down, communicate with your client in a non-emotional, professional manner – preferably in a positive way, but clearly, so that future problems can be avoided.

Not proposing a follow-up idea. Often a freelancer will complete an assignment, and then move on to an assignment with another client. Perhaps the freelancer hopes that the assignment that he completed was so amazing, the client will be knocking down his door the next day. Unfortunately, that often doesn’t happen. If you don’t provide the basis of future business, you might not see it. How to avoid: when you complete an assignment, propose a follow-up idea for future work. If you don’t hear back, follow up.

Not having multiple income streams. Relying on one or two clients is always a bad idea. If your main client drops you, or reduces his freelancer budget, or goes out of business, you’re out of luck. And now you can’t pay your bills. How to avoid: Always have multiple income streams. You might start with one freelance client (we all do in the beginning), but don’t rely on that as your primary source of income until you’ve added more clients. And if you can get other sources of income streams (a full- or part-time job, another business, your spouse’s income, advertising on a blog, selling a product, Amway), you should work hard to do so. It will make your income much more stable and reliable.

Allowing yourself to slack. Let’s face it: some days, we don’t feel like working. And that’s fine, if we plan for that flexibility, and make up for it on other days. But too many days of slacking, and soon you aren’t getting any income. And you’re missing deadlines. Not good. How to avoid: It’s fine to give yourself flexibility, so that you can work when you feel productive, but if you have deadlines to meet, don’t let yourself slack off. Push yourself to meet the deadline, and work in bursts to motivate yourself.

Failing to be yourself. Often we take work because we need the income, but it doesn’t align with who we are. And we feel awful about it, and slowly we begin to hate ourselves. Until we no longer want to do the work. How to avoid: Seek, from the beginning, to find work that aligns with your values, that allows you to be who you are. Being fake and dishonest, to others and to yourself, gets you nowhere. Be sincere in your interactions with others, and don’t be afraid to say no to stuff that doesn’t fit who you are. Always strive to find work you love.

 Written by Leo Babauta

In the process of achieving something worthwhile in life, every person has experienced at least one failure. Facing up a failure, the first sensation is if not overwhelming at least unpleasant. In our mind immediately appears the idea to give up, especially when the aspiration level was too higher than an average one. The “fall” is bigger in this case and so it’s more difficult to pull yourself together. From personal experience I know that when the disappointment is huge everything is worthless in those moments and it’s hard to see the good part.

Since it’s not psychologically recommended to remain under the failure’s pressure, can a failure be seen as a success?! Maybe some of you will be surprised by this idea, replying that a failure can’t bring us something good. Well, I recently found myself in the situation of denying the positive part of a failure … and I wasn’t right …. Failures come over us but the most important thing which can make a difference is how we react to the failure’s effects.

A few concepts more or less known and interiorized help us to proper react to a failure:

Attitude – I’ve read somewhere that attitude is much more important than aptitude, because if we adopt a defeated attitude we will be “crushed” no matter how smart and capable we are. Positive attitude always makes us to keep on going. It’s also making easy for us to consider the failure as a learning event, a step forward in reaching our goals.

Being realistic – To solve a certain problem it’s absolutely necessary to be realistic about it. This means to select only the objective information eliminating the unfunded assumptions. The condition to be realistic provides us the possibility to see very clear the level that we’ve reached. We become conscious that it’s no need to go back to the start but to continue our work from a higher level.

Acceptance – When something doesn’t come out as we expect we easily fall into the “if only” trap. It’s obvious we can’t change the past so it’s unproductive to keep on thinking like this. The persistence of these words keeps us from accepting the failure and from dealing with it. As hard as it seems the failure must be surpassed.

Expressing Emotion – We have to allow ourselves to get rid of the interior pressure and not to deny our normal feelings. So it’s ok to cry, to share an awful moment with a friend or to write about it.

Confidence – The idea is not to give up on us but to keep on having trust in our capacities.

If we follow these steps in confronting a failure we will have a different perspective on life’s ups and downs. I believe that we also need bad moments and breakdowns to discover and to prove to ourselves how strong we are. Everyone discovers his full potential when he reaches his point of failure. Remember that quitters never win and winners never quit! – Psychologist, Nicoleta Cramaruc